Divorcing a narcissist is not simple. This kind of person wants to “win” the “battle” of divorcing, even though divorcing isn’t really anything other than separating and breaking up with your partner.
Emotionally, it can be hard to handle the threats and manipulation that you may go through when divorcing a narcissist. They might try to love bomb you to get you to stay, or they may be angry that you won’t give in to what they want and try to take it out on you with threats or by filing dozens of motions that tie you up in court.
Realistically, divorcing a narcissist is one of the hardest things to do, but you can take action to protect yourself.
Legal options when divorcing a narcissist
You have multiple legal options when divorcing a narcissist. Right away, your first step should be to get as many of your financial documents and papers as possible to your attorney. You can also copy text messages or emails that you think they need to see, such as those from your ex-partner threatening you or stating that they’ll manipulate the case to hurt you. Having evidence against them from the start may help you have more leverage.
Next, you should consider letting your attorney be the negotiator. While you might want to look into mediation or arbitration with a reasonable spouse, a narcissistic spouse may not be interested or will be looking for a fight even if you do go through those options.
Third, if you have children, now is the time to look into setting boundaries and establishing methods of keeping them safe. Using court-monitored communications could make sure that you have evidence if your ex doesn’t bring them home on time or threatens to withhold custody.
It’s a challenge to divorce those with harsh personalities
Divorcing someone who doesn’t want to go through a divorce can be very difficult, but it is possible. With enough documentation and good organization, you can limit your ex-spouse’s options and make sure you’re clear that you’re moving on and don’t want further complications as you do.